Top 10? 11? Who even knows anymore? Liveblog

We have a real nomenclature problem this season. Fox is calling this “Top 9 Performs” but historically—well. Anyway. The theme tonight is 80s.

Jessica March 25, 20158:03 pm

Reuben isn’t home yet so you have to deal with my unadulterated nonsense

Jessica March 25, 20158:04 pm

I don’t think I like the scruffy Seacrest

Jessica March 25, 20158:05 pm

And here’s the Hoff, for some reason

Jessica March 25, 20158:06 pm

The Hoff demands we have fun like in the 80s, so, cocaine I guess?

Jessica March 25, 20158:06 pm

Oh boy a Hoff medley!

Jessica March 25, 20158:07 pm

Hoff is no Rick Astley

Jessica March 25, 20158:08 pm

Ok, that’s mercifully over.

Jessica March 25, 20158:09 pm

Oh boy. George. Is the mentor. Boy George. He used to be so pretty. All that plastic surgery. Sigh.

Jessica March 25, 20158:10 pm

Oooh hilariously bad group sing! Of Karma Chameleon!

Jessica March 25, 20158:12 pm

Harmonica guy rockin’ out

Jessica March 25, 20158:12 pm

Did something happen to Boy George’s voice? He’s barely singing

Jessica March 25, 20158:14 pm

Daniel is safe. BOOOOOOOOOO.

Jessica March 25, 20158:15 pm

Oh GOD Daniel was born in 1999. I am so old. And also he’s the worst.

Jessica March 25, 20158:15 pm

He’s singing a Hall & Oates song? Uggghhhhh.

Jessica March 25, 20158:16 pm

Specifically, “You’re Making My Dreams Come True”

Jessica March 25, 20158:16 pm

Well it started out less terrible than he has historically

Jessica March 25, 20158:17 pm

I don’t know that I’d call it precisely good

Jessica March 25, 20158:18 pm

People, stop voting for Daniel. It’s not funny.

Jessica March 25, 20158:19 pm

Keith says if he could do three songs, the second and third songs would be ok. Sure. That’s reasonable. Let’s just let him keep singing until he does a decent job.

Jessica March 25, 20158:19 pm

You know, or not

Jessica March 25, 20158:25 pm

Quentin is safe (good)

Jessica March 25, 20158:26 pm

I love his stupid hairy coat so much. He must be roasting though.

Jessica March 25, 20158:27 pm

Quentin is singing Phil Collins’s “In the Air Tonight”

Jessica March 25, 20158:28 pm

I think he’s doing a creditable job of it

Jessica March 25, 20158:29 pm

And there’s that drum fill!

Jessica March 25, 20158:29 pm

This is too good a performance to be stuck at the beginning of the show, in whatever the opposite of a pimp spot is

Jessica March 25, 20158:30 pm

Harry criticizes his choices of slow or medium tempo songs. I dunno.

Jessica March 25, 20158:31 pm

Quentin is wearing GIGANTIC platform sneakers

Jessica March 25, 20158:38 pm

Joey is safe

Jessica March 25, 20158:38 pm

Like Joey, I always wanted a chia pet

Jessica March 25, 20158:39 pm

Shockingly Joey is doing “Girls Just Want to Have Fun”

Jessica March 25, 20158:41 pm

Oh man this is bad. Joey’s worst performance ever I think.

Reuben March 25, 20158:42 pm

That was … I don’t even know. There was a reggae breakdown, it was manic. Bleh.

Jessica March 25, 20158:48 pm

Tyanna is safe

Jessica March 25, 20158:50 pm

Aaaand Tyanna has made the questionable decision to take on Whitney Houston’s “I Wanna Dance with Somebody”

Reuben March 25, 20158:50 pm

This is horribly out of tune.

Jessica March 25, 20158:50 pm

Oh man. Off-key.

Reuben March 25, 20158:58 pm

Jax is safe.

Jessica March 25, 20159:00 pm

Jax is singing Bon Jovi’s “You Give Love a Bad Name”

Jessica March 25, 20159:00 pm

This is… ok? Sometimes good but sometimes bad?

Reuben March 25, 20159:00 pm

I was kind of afraid that this season would be a bunch of Jena Irene wannabes. Jax is kinda doing that. I mean, she’s fine, but she’s no Jena Irene.

Jessica March 25, 20159:01 pm

Jax avoids sibilants by just making sh sounds instead of ss sounds

Reuben March 25, 20159:01 pm

These young people interpret the 1980s as bad club remixes.

Jessica March 25, 20159:02 pm

That’s not altogether surprising, I guess

Reuben March 25, 20159:03 pm

Top 9 performs means we’re losing two people. Adanna is totally gone, right? So who else? I say Rayvon over Maddie, subjectively. Maddie maybe hangs on because she’s the only country girl left.

Reuben March 25, 20159:06 pm

Top 9 performs means we’re losing two people. Adanna is totally gone, right? So who else? I say Rayvon, subjectively. Maddie maybe hangs on because she’s the only country girl left.

Reuben March 25, 20159:10 pm

Nick is safe.

Jessica March 25, 20159:12 pm

Nick is doing Michael Jackson’s “Man in the Mirror”

Reuben March 25, 20159:12 pm

So far this is like what the NKOTB version of this song would be.

Jessica March 25, 20159:12 pm

I’m not feelin’ it.

Jessica March 25, 20159:13 pm

The Michael Jackson version makes you feel something. This isn’t doing that for me.

Reuben March 25, 20159:13 pm

This is at least in tune. But yeah, this is a theme park performance.

Reuben March 25, 20159:20 pm

I think usually at this point in the season I can point to a few performances I really liked. I can’t do that this year. I really liked Fancy. That’s about it.

Reuben March 25, 20159:21 pm

I guess Spinderella got a pink slip?

Jessica March 25, 20159:23 pm

This didn’t need to happen

Reuben March 25, 20159:24 pm

That was enjoyed by tens of people.

Reuben March 25, 20159:26 pm

Spinderella: Hey guys, so we’re going on Idol tonight?
Salt N Pepa: Uh, yeah, WE are. Not you.

Reuben March 25, 20159:28 pm

Clark is safe.

Jessica March 25, 20159:29 pm

Who told Clark that Battleship isn’t for girls? What an ass.

Jessica March 25, 20159:30 pm

And Lite Brite was awesome. So screw you to the max, Clark.

Reuben March 25, 20159:30 pm

I use my penis when I play Battleship.

Reuben March 25, 20159:31 pm

Nice reharmonization on this. I like it.

Reuben March 25, 20159:32 pm

Yeah, so that one note was under a few cents, but I overall I dug it.

Jessica March 25, 20159:34 pm

Source

Reuben March 25, 20159:34 pm

I normally withhold judgment, since things can change a lot, but at this point I’m having trouble seeing anybody but Clark winning.

Reuben March 25, 20159:40 pm

Qaasim is safe.

Jessica March 25, 20159:42 pm

And Qaasim is singing Addicted to Love.

Jessica March 25, 20159:44 pm

Meh

Reuben March 25, 20159:44 pm

This song is about the beat. You have to hit that cadence. He’s not doing that.

Jessica March 25, 20159:45 pm

That got super weird at the end, too

Reuben March 25, 20159:45 pm

When Robert Palmer sings it he’s staccato, he’s perfectly on the beat every time. That was kind of a travesty.

Reuben March 25, 20159:47 pm

They revealed the bottom 3! It’s Maddie, Rayvon, and Adanna.

Reuben March 25, 20159:53 pm

Rayvon is safe. Maddie and Adanna eliminated. See the article I published earlier today.

Jessica March 25, 20159:54 pm

Boooooooo. Adanna even dressed up like Mickey Mouse!

Reuben March 25, 20159:54 pm

I’m a little sad about Maddie, tbh.

Jessica March 25, 20159:55 pm

Rayvon looks terrified

Reuben March 25, 20159:56 pm

Again, this is overly legato.

Reuben March 25, 20159:56 pm

The drummer is playing 4 on the floor. Listen to your band.

Jessica March 25, 20159:56 pm

This is bad and boring and bad

Jessica March 25, 20159:57 pm

I mean ok it’s not bad like Daniel is bad

Bookmark the permalink.

Comments are closed